the new term for farting is butt boxing.
I never want to see another naked old woman again.
Dude love is like an itch. You fuckin scratch it, then it itches more, then you scratch it and it itches more, and before you know it, there is semen everywhere.
you are insane
there are certain things about getting into a cab to go home at 630 am that make me feel like a prostitute.
He's paying me $45 to clean his room and $55 if i find the oxy that he lost.
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
It's alarming how good I'm getting at being productive at work on Thursday after Johnny Walker Wednesdays.
im just glad that if you were going to have awkward hospital sex, you would want it with me
we need to start a braincell conservation fund for you, sort of like save the whales or something.
maybe next time you'll take an ex boyfriend warning you that she's batshit crazy as a warning instead of a challenge
You know it's been awhile when the imagery of fucking AT A DENNY'S gets me really turned on.
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
When the sex is so good, you need three fans and have to chug a gallon of water after
I can't have my last hookup before 21 have been behind a dumpster
I spend so much of my life shaving my body hair off and I want nothing more than his beard in all my hairless places.
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