I want to stick my p in your. b.
I think my vagina is haunted
so he came on my face and then proceeded to say "that was just how i imagined it would happen"
where do you find these guys?
I wish you could see the look on my boss's face right now.
Before you passed out in the middle of the NHL 10 party you had to prove that you were a better fighter than Patrick Kane. Your not. Thanks for the black eye dipshit.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so was this before or after i puked down the ice luge?
I had never watched a guy jack off to me before, but let me tell you, it was a very uncomfortable experience.
She's like the Michael Jordan of alcoholism
Im going to hell in a hand basket. With a ribbon tied to my head. I'll be like a puppy for the devil.
No. I just want to cuddle and talk about our feeling. Of course this a booty call.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It seems that only way I've actually improved myself after 2 years of writing for the school newspaper is that I've mastered the art of descriptive words to improve my sexting skills
I found all these half eaten mandarin orange on the ground and the bruises on my neck are definetely not hickies
I gave him a bunch of ideas to use to spice up their sex life. Say what you will, I am the best 'other' woman ever!
I see your creepy poodle photo and raise you a shirtless elderly gentleman who looks like a yetti in cutoffs who may or may not have an ENORMOUS erection.
Have fun in Vegas! Be safe, use condoms, and take a pic of Jon beforehand to give out when he goes missing. It will help the police.
Whoever thought of breakup sex is my new best friend