what are u so afraid of ive smelled ur poop before
I think its a sure sign I need to get laid when every cloud in the sky looks like a penis.
Well, for starters you dressed up in all Green and kept singing that song from "A Goofy Movie". Then you made us call you Powerline for the rest of the night...needless to say no, you didn't hook up with her
we do all of our sexting over chat on words with friends, so my boyfriend doesn't know about it when he looks at my texts.
I will never get the visual of you crying while chewing christmas lights out of my head
If that really is brett favre's penis, no wonder she ignored his calls
I'm one ex away from doing an entire victory lap of all of the guys I've hooked up with since second semester of freshman year. Single me is scary.
And tell the hostess not to worry, she's narcoleptic and fell asleep on the way to the bar, but she'll be fine in a few minutes.
Sitting here reading the internet and all i have to show for this summer is a shitty tan and the possible case of clamidia.
Oh yeah and one of the strippers brought you chips and water when you were passes out next to the toilet. So that was nice
Sometimes I think about the fact that I lost my virginity while watching anime and I wonder what that says about me
just like cleaning my room and being more organized in my life. more so just making sure a toaster doesn't end up in my car again for 2 months
He fed me Girl Scout cookies while I was still tied up...what did I do right?
you put your dick on my shoulder this morning like it was a fucking parrot
Looking back, we probably shouldn't have chased alcohol with more alcohol
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