He disabled his match.com account in front of me
if your phone is working sorry i called you at 2am. if it is not then i never called your phone at 2am
dude she was givin me head and stops and looks up at me and tells me she loves me, then goes ''alright now cum in my mouth''.... pretty sure shes the one
I just negotiated a blow job for an interview.
this is a reminder to untag myself in the picture of me flashing the photographer in the morning.
My vagina is not really on board with my "emotional issues"
Really? Uh ohh sounds like a double date with extra stripper funnnn
I flashed some kids doing a church car wash. I feel like I really improved the quality of their lives.
These kids are nice. Shrooms make everything so nice.
It's 10:15 on a Wednesday night and my dick is covered in pop rocks. How's your Wednesday going?
The moment buddy the elf found out he was human is exactly like the moment I realized I was gay
You haven't lived until you have fucked while Fantasia is on
Butt Stuff 2016 unites us all
Grrr. Fine. You get oral for being unwrong.
I WANNA... wait, will you kinkshame me?
Nah.
I WANNA KNOW WHAT HE SMELLS LIKE
Randomize
