Saying she let herself go implies she was actually holding on
woke up this morning to find the entire staircase covered in marinara sauce, with my roommate practically sobbing and scrubbing the wall with carpet cleaner.
I did the seizure Bad Romance dance again last night, didn't I?
you were really good actually. your skill is increasing over time
I can't tell which way is up. Too many corners around his house too. An arbitary assimilation of edges.
Christ, I swear you are the high man's Dr. Seuss.
Sundays should be dedicated to Girl Scout cookies, sex, and super hero movies.
This guy smells like mr Rogers puppets and I don't know how to deal with it
I ate all his french fries. He was no longer useful to me.
Everyone was hooking up and I was just by myself rolling around in the grass at one point ... Which I am allergic to.
Last thing I ever expected to say, "Get your finger out of my ear or I will stop sucking your dick."
And I just realized we will be at a strip club when the end of the world is supposed to happen. This is destiny
I think I need to expose myself to your dog so he knows that I am also a male.
How many times is too many times to use the word 'fuck' in my thesis?
I'd say I was is in rare form last night but it's becoming pretty common.
Anytime he goes down on me i automatically think of you cheering me on. Your a good friend.
What the hell do you do when your fuck buddy leaves to go for a piss naked and 20 minutes later hasn't come back and can't be found anywhere in the house or outside but has left his phone, tee shirt and shoes in your bedroom.
I don't think there is a pre defined social etiquette for a lost naked fuck buddy now roaming the streets.
Randomize
