I have had sex with more partners than how old he is.
I just criticized a porno's use of editing. Film school is ruining me.
My drug dealer asked me out. What's the protocal for this?
buying my parents vodka for Christmas is like buying a normal person socks.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just put up a picture on my dorm room wall of that ginger you hooked up with to remind myself that everyone makes mistakes
Well Im currently dressed up as batman raiding frat houses for booze
I feel choking has become trendy-- ita losing its effect. I may just have to go back to missionary to spice it up
I don't think it's food poisoning, I think it's cause you cooked it over burning styrofoam
His dad gives me dirty looks whenever I come over though. I think it's because I eat his food and have sex with his son.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My stuff that was at your place last night smells like doughnuts. I'm not even mad.
TYLER OWES ME SO MUCH
I LET A CREEPY MAN I DONT KNOW SUCK ON MY NIPPLES
People trash cargo shorts, but I'm like, sorry I had room for beers and you didn't.
so I think we need to change lawn care services...the guy woke me up by the pool while I was naked...told me he already picked up all the beer cans for us and gave me his number for the next time we party...
I just puked in a chili’s bathroom... happy birthday to me
After we fucked we sat in bed and watched Charlie St. Cloud and he fed me ice cream. It was probably the most romantic thing I've ever done.
Randomize