Dude I gave him a bj because he was upset about the NFL draft, if that doesn't lock it down, i don't know what does
dude it was like an art museum there were boobs everywhere
The lack of pants and amount of productivity in my life right now is amazing.
its not college until your roomate walks in on you having sex in his bed. twice
Dude i'm seriously thinking about his nipples.
I woke up tied to the door handle with reindeer patterned socks. You can tell it's Christmas.
This may be hard to believe, but that wasn't the first time I was fingered under a snuggie
It's not
I'm sure it's not the worst thing to ever come out of my ass
You don't understand. There's baclava and there's post sex baclava. You can't compare the two.
I don't know if you've ever seen a group of 20 year olds reenact a rectal prolapse, but 'majestic' isn't really the word I'd use...
The amount of effort it's taking me to not shit my pants this morning is probably a sign to slow down the drinking
There something liberating about walking through the dorm hallways without pants on.
I love you. You know I enjoy the constant sex noises
Well Jon got a DUI sleeping in the back seat so I thought the trunk was safer. BUT WHO CARES WHY JUSE PLEASE COME LET ME OUT!
If you have been drunk at one point during the day and are going to bed sober that same day, something is very wrong.
Randomize
