her vagine was all disorganized.
I'm trying this new thing, it's called standards
i just used the Cadillac of toilet papers. For a minute i actually forgot i was even wiping my ass....i thought i was floating butt first into heaven
woke up to find a pram in the balcony. first thing we did was look over the edge!
the guy was wearing a viagra shirt, i knew what i got myself into.
I would never do this in real life. It's only college.
I am making a budget for 2012. Should condoms be in the insurance or entertainment category?
I was tackling you out of excitement
Yeah thank goodness the stripper pole was there to break my fall.
I'll always remember 2012 as the year I hooked up with countless girls who had the sides of their heads shaved.
And that kids is the last time I ever try to outdrink Germans
Way to fucking accidentally drunk dial me while you're talking to and buying other girls drinks. Don't call me.
it was the most awkward makeout ever. it was record breaking really
...i feel like you have a lot of those.
This is a hot dog holiday. I intend to do my part for the processed meat workers of this great union.
is it weird that i just witnessed the marriage of someone ive had sex with on multiple occasions?
Then it hit me - his penis wasn't a shiny new toy anymore and I wanted a new one.
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