I hate how you keep a running list of people who have seen me naked.
I just saw a guy in the gym riding the bicycle while watching baseball and dipping.
its taking every last moral i have not to steal this bike
you still have morals?
Well actually itd just be too hard to ride the bike with this large rake i just stole
We had to leave the bar because you were trying to show the bartender your boobs for water.
I can't leave. She doesn't trust me and my penis being out in the world without supervision.
you can officially check off peeing off the 5th floor while shouting "I want to break the guinness world record for longest piss stream" off your college to do list.
I've never been so embarrassed. It's like waking up as Fred Durst.
I'm still hoping for it dude. Random north dakota pussy. If my 16 year old self knew that these were my dreams he would so try to beat me up, and i think he could.
I'm considering having a threesome with my friend just so I can sleep with his boyfriend and not feel guilty about it.
If I spent my amateur stripper money does that mean I am cleansed of my sins?
Oh yeah. I pretty much fucked the universes brains out lastnight. It was glorious.
He fucked me in his tour van, I feel like an official groupie.... Except I don't even listen to his band.
I feel like your personal Bdsm barbie...
Couch. On fire.
You kept on yelling traitor and threatened to kill him and everyone he loves because he played beerpong with someone else
Randomize
