her eyes looked like someone had poured fruit punch in them. needless to say we had a good time.
I am currently in the waffle making stage of highness
Two things. 1 - I want to apologize for my drunkeness last night. 2 - I want to pre-apologize for my anticipated drunkeness tonight.
Empowerment dancing to Touch Me in the Morning by Diana Ross. Handling this breakup SO well.
I deserve like a purple heart or something. I just made it all the way drunk through my 2 story house without making a sound. While carrying a trombone.
Just so we're clear this time around: This is dinner with my FAMILY. Not an opportunity for you to drink too much, and use the word "dick-thumpin" in casual conversation.
I blacked out for most of the day but apparently I still met with my prof. I made notes...
I'm gonna get drunk in the shower and yell at my parents during dinner. Have fun in Texas.
Apparently I'm short enough to sit on his lap and fuck him while he is driving because the cop didn't notice.
i keep seeing little orange spots im starting to freak out
you tried mixing adderall in your visine last night..
I think once you know a guy's chest measurements the stalking has gone too far..
I just ate cottage cheese and went to the gym at 6 this morning...the things i'll do because I might get naked in front of a new boy
I would just like to point out that a bandaid led to sex. The lesson here is always have a bandaid in your wallet.
It was dumb but not something to force me into sobriety
Idk what's worse.... Yesterday not waking up in my bed or today waking up in the hello kitty gown.
Randomize
