Pretty sure somebody just said 'I used to have a nipple'
that's awkward
i fucked her mom dude
there's something to tell the kids
do you think you could subtly ask him about the dimensions of his penis?
In the middle of fucking me, she said "Hold on, I need my Hulk hands."
Being the only woman in a triathlon group - it's a penis paradise.
Dude, if I don't end up wearing a banana suit in Milwaukee, I will consider that trip a complete failure.
Oh my god there's only so much masturbating one can do before one wants to fucking cry
He carried around a bottle of jäger the whole night and when everyone thought the cops came, he started doing push ups in the middle of the floor cause he said it calmed him down.
I worked all year for this tax return. I deserve to get my nipples pierced.
I'll say this one last time. You are TWENTY FIVE YEARS OLD. You are not going to die alone and this is not the twilight of your life. Stop taking shrooms on your period!!!!
The moment you tore my shirt off I knew I wanted to spend the rest of my life with you
Remember those two guys in our frat that would no homo everything? I just got an invitation to their wedding.
I always knew ther was a reason why we're best friends
Obvs our love of drugs
I like to think of it more as our love of curiosity
I am cleaning melted cheese out of my hair. This is a new experience for me
He made me ask permission to to cum and it made me cum.
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