Exactly. All of us sinners go to hell and get nothing while all of the goody two shoes get to go to heaven where its all pink floyd, lasers, and pot.
U know u have sex too much when u have lube in ur rolliball on ur blackberry
I came out, you were peeing on the car and when I asked why you said it deserved it because its a rental
She is wasted and this random lady got her to suckle milk from her tit
But mostly fuck him senseless. Render him speechless. Have him look at my vagina and wonder, "WHAT SORCERY IS THIS?!"
WHY did you say no to the sex seance?
Remember how he wouldn't sleep with me "out of respect"? Well, Mr. Respect just fingered me in a parking garage.
She's not a foreskin expert like you
If I had your job the next day id be on the news. And not the good news. Like fox & friends. Nancy grace would have my ass.
AHHHHHHHHH. I LEFT A GLASS NEXT TO ME WHEN I FELL ASLEEP I'M SO SURE IT WAS WATER BUT NOW IT'S VODKA JESUS MADE A STOP
If you're signed up as "sober sister" can you do cocaine or nah
All I remember is pissing by the garage and the next thing I know I'm on fire
We damn well better have a snow day tomorrow. We just broke out the rum.
RUDE you're the one missing half a nipple...
IT HEALED AND GREW BACK TO BE A FULL HEALTHY NIPPLE OKAY
I'm so high I have morphed into the monopoly man. Or maybe the Pringles guy. I don't know but I have a mustach now
Randomize