Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
Just saved her as "new hostess that randy banged" ...I forgot her name
Drunk sex destroyed my coffee table... ikea this weekend?
the coastal evacuation route ends at my vagina so you can just skip the bullshit and come over
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
God damn. I'm really starting to resent babies. They're everywhere. Like fucking land mines.
True bitches know their best friends favorite Boones Farm flavor.
I think I fixed my testicle. That's why I didnt pay $25 for a doctor to do it
I wanna come do a blessing for your apartment. And by that I mean I want to drink a lot of whiskey and watch ancient aliens in your apartment
Random question: Have you ever woken up and were suprised to not have a penis?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I sent you a snap of me in the bath, and you sent me a snap of a taco. An actual taco.
mid-october of freshman year. goals have shifted from "no more guys on my floor" to "all the guys on my floor."
I woke up with masking tape on my nipples this morning........... WHY DO BAD THINGS HAPPEN TO GOOD PEOPLE
I was floored. Like way less concerned with him using drugs than I am with him not believing in evolution.
I don't think it's a coincidence that the day I just happen to do the splits at the gym I come back with 7 guys' phone numbers.
You bet your firm but soft ass I miss you
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