New word for getting laid so we don't sound like whores in public when we are talking about it : stamp the passport
I really hope your girlfriend didnt have your phone while i texted how much i loved doing it in HER car with you :x
Is it wierd that I kind of wish I could hang out with Melissa Joan Hart?
we were holding hands throwing up into the same garbage can; if thats not true love i dont know what is .
I feel like i made up for not being able to drink on St Pattys Day, Mardi Gras, and last years Cinco De Mayo. That hungover.
whats a positive sounding word for "exploit"?
We have a drunk bartender with her nips a quarter inch from bein out buying us shots. GET HERE.
You just said the magic words
I will probably be peed on at some point today.
And he was super vague about his life, it was frustrating. I totally boned a homeless guy, didn't I?
I need moral support for this bender
Haha! I've never met his girlfriend, so my main focus will be not saying,"you're the only person in this room that doesn't know what my vagina feels like."
I swear to god little potato creatures live inside Belvedere bottles and claw at your throat as you swallow shots.
I am truly sorry that you have to put your dog down. He was a great dog, and a great friend. I am still not showing you my tits.
All I'm saying is the next time I see him naked, there better be something in it for me that doesn't end in bailing him out of jail.
Strip club, what strip club did I eat a steak at? That's the appropriate question
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