was i over the top when i said that i wished they made v-neck pants to her?
i justawanted to let you know that illi aalways be thwew for ui and o qill waasag youer dog whenebvet u wsnt
I glued a penny on the door Tricia believes its Patrick Swayze haunting our apartment. Fuckin potheads.
Everything smells like blood and olive oil.
Slept with my first Irish dude before I even got off the plane. Dublin has no idea what I have in store for it.
Serious questions. Who is that girl? Why is she wearing a tiara? And why does she keep asking about penis piercings?
Also I just had a flash back ... He told me I have nice nipples and then asked me about yours..
It gives me purpose in life to help fulfill nerdy fantasies. Like I'm doing something good for mankind and having multiple orgasms in the process.
Well it's like a wise man once told me: "If you're going to shave your balls, don't do it hungover."
Oh man, are we repeating last 4th of July?!
That shouldn't even be a question, it's a tradition now. Hope your manhood is ready.
The quality of my porn watching experience has significantly declined. Thanks shattered iphone screen
especially when i'm drunk. his dick might as well be made of cotton candy.
We were literally making dick jokes with his dick out
That’s the level of friends with benefits I aspire to achieve
Vocabulary what?!? Shakespeare is my bitch.
It’s only loud for those who wanna get loud. The bowlers are protected.
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