drink some water, pull the trigger, get a bfast sandwich. Only good things.
# days @ Coachella: 1 people i showed how to break it down: 279
wait.. the condom broke. ehh whatever i think im already 2 months pregnant
Just found my girlfriend's stash of animated Japanese porn
And to think, I actually considered breaking up with her
she is like cheap alcohol. you can only get so buzzed before you get sick.
Ok roommate is officially weird. Just watched her microwave the same broccoli 3 times in a row and cry b/c she fucked it up. Wtf lol
You know what's fun. When your getting a new mattress and you forget you put your vibrator under your old mattress and the moving guy finds it
We have so much sex to catch up on
The yoga party turned into an underwear party because we are all incompetent when it comes to tying bed sheets.
This has been a Party Success Story
Making drunken Mac n cheese at 3 am I understand why witches constantly stir their cauldrons. Much more homogenized temperature and slim chance of boiling over. Good job witches.
Cant really say how it happened but i woke up in the middle of the night and somehow pissed all over connors dad
My throw up tasted like pumpkin, fall is right around the corner.
There is a midget in cheetah face paint on a leash here
I mean I've only met the girl once and she was trying to slit some guys tires.
To be fair, this is a tequila-while-rewatching-Benedict-Cumberbatch-as-Van-Gogh idea, so I don't know if it will hold up tomorrow.
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