the power's out. i'm smoking weed by flashlight
i wish i was dedicated to anything like you are to weed
walking on gravel proved too much for her barefeet so she traded her bra for some guys sneakers.
I'm so over stopping myself from talking about my sexual experiences in front of children.
that shirt you're wearing that says "officially single" makes me think you'll be that way for a really long fucking time.
So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
I just want to go some place where I can have a nice night. Grind on men who speak no English, make out with a girl, and not feel judged.
You dont understand he had a split tongue thats bucket list worthy.
at what point did you see referring to the bartender as 'the white precious' a good idea??
I THINK I JUST JOINED A GANG. PLEASE PICK ME UP.
Tonights drinking will be celebratory and victorious. Picture the end of The Mighty Ducks set to beer.
that's where you went wrong. never assume I'm adult enough to do something on my own.
Why didn't you tell me I was calling her by her sisters name all night?
I'm playing a lilo and stitch drinking game
Aloha alcoholism.
wait did i hook up with someone in mcdonalds last night?
What happened after I vommed in your shirt that I was wearing and threw it out the window on the highway?
Randomize
