I CAN MOONWALK!
you were chalanging people to drink the "worlds biggest jager bomb" - a VASE of Redbull and a PINT of Jager... is it no wonder you dont remember anything?
Weird. Haha. I guess taking advice from batman is a good idea.
a commercial for my antidepressant came on and they said you shouldn't take if if you drink right as i took a shot
god is laughing at you again
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i would one night stand the shit outta him
we bribed her with croutons and jello shots.
The nursing school interview showed me a picture of my passed out during your party. They asked if this was a frquent thing. I told them you drugged me.
She makes me want to eat babies and throw kittens in pots of boiling water.
I hear the sound of that stray bird you rescued from the kitchen but am too busy drunkenly masturbating to feed it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She sucks. And I almost hooked up with a clown last night
Is it unethical to trim my bush hair with the scissors from my office?
is it weird that our first time having sex was makeup sex?
My VP dropped me off at the Strip Club in Houston. Just said "I was never here".
Company meeting and there he was. Felt a little weird like 'last night you were telling me how your dick loves me, and now we're listening to a report on sales figures'.
BOOOOOOOOOOOO *takes away your hoe card*
Randomize