Friends don't let friends fuck ugly girls. WALK AWAY FROM HER!
im naked on webcam to her boyfriend, but im playing neopets at the same time, so its all evened out
I just randomly started counting the number of guys that I've hooked up with that are now gay. 11.
I just noticed she took the "toys" too. That's how you know when it's really over.
He makes me wish my vagina was bigger... This must be what love feels like.
I just found our entire wall-to-wall from September 2006 printed out and clipped... it's 49 pages. Blackout me is so considerate of bored-at-work me
The only reason we got away with streaking last time was cuz we had those miner hats
Okay throwing up in my mouth a little = time to go home
People don't tend to fuck with you when they think you have someone else's blood on your face
I just threw up vodka and hot dogs in a handicapped stall with someone in it who couldn't make me leave because he couldn't walk.
Anyone see the sob who took the piñata?
I finally had to say "that's the hole where I pee" for him to understand.
I'd have to have a ring. Like I don't want to be called "the ex girlfriend that shit on me"
somehow I wound up on the floor crying about his beard. then telling everyone I'd give him a "lesbian blowjob".
If you find out what that means, show me.
Three cans of beer can fit in the shower catty... multi tasking
Randomize
