you alive?
ya, the episode of maury where people are afraid of things are on, i had to keep livin
When we ran out of red solo cups we switched to Starbucks cups for beer pong... Who doesn't want to live in Seattle?
I wonder if i passed any courses from last semester
We can't bring brittanys dog so we are getting high and getting in my bathtub I think it's pretty safe
Chicken salad taco, you know, when you're out of bread and crackers, and high.
my knee is completely bruised from kneesliding into the bowling ball. bowling for creativity points was a win
a guy just walked up to us....drank the rest of my beer....and said sorry for my loss before walking away.
I've just stalked all the hot guys who have clicked "attending". I now know which guys are "yes", "maybe" and "no". I only hope my drunk self remembers.
I'm trying to pinpoint the moment when "don't do anything I wouldn't do" became bad advise.
Brian got his first ever blow job last night. We should make him a scrapbook.
I fell into his fridge. I want to leave.
I can feel the shame as I walk down your hallway.. good night
How so I keep attracting the virgins? HOW?
You talk about your love for your ninja turtle onesie when you're drunk. Are you really surprised?
He's finally divorcing her, so naturally he tells me that we're not exclusive anymore. His penis 'wants what it wants' apparently.
Look, if it comes down to it, I’m spraying whipped cream on your nuts
Randomize
