nothing says platonic group sex like a campfire and smores
he wrote Vegans should suck on cow dick on her wall with permanent marker. thats how he got the black eye
when we were having sex and i started crying and telling you i missed you..why couldnt you stop and tell me how you felt or make me feel better?you kept going...
found some acid from a couple months ago while looking through christmas lights. Looks like santa came early this year.
She said she didn't want to have sex because she was so torn up about "this whole NBC thing."
Whatever. I'll let someone else deal with his flacid penis.
He freaked out when I started to orgasm. He said he never knew girls could orgasm too.
I feel like I had eight dicks in my mouth
Did I happen to mention where i left my keys when I drunk dialed you last night
and on the second day it was tequilla tuesday. and the lord saw it was good.
Peanut butter balls.
IF YOU EVEN COME NEAR MY BALLS AGAIN I SWEAR TO GOD
Shotgunning beers to finish a midterm project at 3am is a good idea right?
Please tell me you're not playing strip poker with your cousins again
Is it bad form to puke out of a dorm window to avoid looking bad in front of the people in your room?
How about from a sixth floor window?
Apparently I repeatedly thanked the paramedic for saving the "happy new year" beads i was wearing. that bad.
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