Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
You know if a vagina was a face, it'd be ugly as hell...
I would dunk an oreo in her breast milk
It was so delicious I was introducing it to people. Guy from my psych class was like "This is my girlfriend, Erica," and I was like, "This is my milkshake, Oreo."
I just saw a guy in front of the courthouse giving himself a sobriety test and fail it...this can't end well
At some point I'd like to figure out how the weird kid from sociology ended up on my couch naked hugging what appears to be some sort of clothing....seriously it's creeping me out
Lets be real here, you loved it when I was on top. With and without the machete.
I make one hell of a fire on Ambien. Other life choices not so much. But fire. Fire I can do.
Oh god I want to come home! They have an air raid siren here that alerts their neighbours across the desert it's time to come over on atvs and drink.
The number of tpain songs that actually relate to my life right now is embarrassing.
Duuuude someone spilled hot sauce all over the floor and trailing outside wtf
OH GOD IT'S BLOOD. THIS IS ALOT OF BLOOD.
did you just send me my own nude
We were walking to the bar with a group of people and literally made 4 stops in people's lawns garages or random walls for him to eat me out
I feel like my foot is being amputated. Or maybe it's the vodka. I couldn't tell you.
God knew I'd have horrible taste in men, so made me asexual to ensure I'd never fuck them.
Randomize
