I just crawled out of a second story window using a sheet and his clothes for a rope so he wouldn't wake up.
I am so glad I watched Macgyver as a kid.
He asked me if I "almost moaned"
How do I say "sorry I gave you and your sister herpes" in German?
when we were having sex and i started crying and telling you i missed you..why couldnt you stop and tell me how you felt or make me feel better?you kept going...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well he has that kind of carefree attitude that comes from a big penis
If this wasn't a work function my tits would be out already.
As I was brushing his cum out of my hair he looks at me and says "it happens to me all the time."
stef broke her leg trying to vault over the coffee table. these olympics drinking games are going to fucking kill us
Post a pic on facebook and see if those same 46 girls find shitting in the bed handsome and adorable
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I hope one day I make out with someone in a taco truck :(
I'm glad I inspire you to reach for the stars
Or a taco
Most drunken moment of the night is me pouring Chanel no. 5 all over your boobs and rubbing it in...
He walked in on me banging his sister and said "you're both old enough to make you own decisions. Carry on"
i just ran butt naked down the hall and someone highfived me. i love college.
And he kept lifting up his shirt every few minutes to check if his nipples were still there
I mean, what's the polite way to say, "sorry but I can't date you cuz I'm sleeping with your boss" ??
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