You're in luck. The brownies don't even have butter, just vege oil
Billy Mays is dead too!
Somewhat annoying American icons better be watching their backs
its taking every last moral i have not to steal this bike
you still have morals?
Well actually itd just be too hard to ride the bike with this large rake i just stole
He lectured me about the dangers of drugs while wearing a sombrero and doing interpretive dance.
Biggest penis I've ever pity fucked
I tried to explain to the cop how we all have skeletons in our closets but he just wouldn't listen.
Throwing up so forcefully that toilet water hits you in the face is not what the Pilgrims and Indians had in mind for this holiday
you threw up into the pocket of your shirt. which was pretty damn polite
We love you just as you are but we might love you more if we didn't have to post bail so often...
Bright side: maybe hell start being nice to you now that you know he has erectile dysfunction.
I think I'm allergic to vodka. Or people getting engaged. One or the other. I want to die.
but I truly enjoy making out with my best friend more than my boyfriend
Carver called his mom a milf again
Was it on purpose this time?
he was wearing a widestriped red gingham suit jacket with complete sincerity im not surprised she beat the shit out of him
Good, but still not as good as the guy I banged in the ball crawl
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