She was like a white Oprah, but with less conviction.
I asked you if you were ok and you said "dude I'm fine, I'm in the recovery position"
Hurry there's a dancing lesbian. She's a jumper and has impeccable jazz hands.
just had a flashback of you pouring champagne into my mouth from someones balcony..
I think the fact that I shit my pants, threw away my underwear in a frat bathroom, lost my socks down a drain in the front yard and still got laid... deserves some sort of a victory drink for myself or a blowjob for him since he was such a good sport.
I think I may have walked up to her while she was with her friends and asked for a "do over".
After the 3rd shot, she was running around singing, "Twinkle Twinkle Big Ol' Dick, on your happy place I'll sit" to your brother.
Put that bitch's torch out. She's been voted off.
I'm at a gyno in Japan. Safe to say every possible rule of etiquette is about to be broken. Buckle up, motherfuckers.
Look at the picture I MADE him take with me...like why??? He's holding my foot?
Simple revenge plan: break into his house and steal one shoe of every pair
There's a bull to ride and dancing on the bar is encouraged. This is my heaven. And this is why god made leopard tube tops.
He referred to our sex as "an Olympic event." My tits are bruised.
spent the night holding naked strippers up for keg stands and doing endless amounts of body shots. good game 8am final exam.
whats an extra semester when you've already been in college for 6 years?
I kinda realized titty fucking is purely for our enjoyment, they dont really get much out of it, except for a guy sitting on them and and a dick bouncing of their chin
27 year olds can still do oral in a car right? Or is that trashy?
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