I think east. Tornado watch. What the fuck are you doing in Texarkana?
Bonnaroo. Tornado watch? Expand on that thought.
Watch for tornadoes.
Im mastering the way to pass gas silently.
Are you seriously drinking already? It's 11AM. Still morning.
I'm going by McDonald's time. And since they stop serving breakfast at 10:30 and start serving lunch, it is now afternoon.
i find it simply astounding you spelled drunken wrong but pterodactyl right
Thanks for stealing lime trees for me at 4:00 am. We're well on our way to having sustainable supplies for mojitos this summer.
Wake and baked to watch the boston marathon. God I love massachusetts
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
We'll probably be arrested for having a cheetah in our apartment anyway, so I say go for it.
The last thing I remember was talking about the economic viability of cock ring manufacturing... we had some good ideas
Kayla got stiches in her face. Rode in an ambulance shotgun. Tried to steal a baby, thought it was mine
At least my fat-chick-ratio has not been that bad this semester ...
We told her to calm down. She said "I'm Buddha!". Then army crawled to the cooler for more vodka.
I think I'm allergic to vodka. Or people getting engaged. One or the other. I want to die.
last night I mixed vodka in with my protein shake... and you tell me my new years resolution was impossible
It's very finicky. Like baking. or BDSM.
Randomize
