Yeah, getting the HI-fiVe would really put a damper on my whoring around.
I wonder sometimes what your vagina thinks about you.
She walked into class late sat down for 5 min muttered 'oh i cant do this' and walked out. She looked like death.
We should party with her soon
He noticed there was ketchup on his shirt and took it off. Noticed there were people there and put it back on. Then he saw the ketchup again. He must have taken his shirt on and off about 6 times
Well, I now know how many glasses of wine it takes for me to fuck my neighbor.
The dumpster is full of naked people swimming. I'm going to join.
Instead of sending me a picture of his dick, he sent me a drawing of it on drawsomething. This game is getting out of control.
Dont worry bro, i'll be the designated kayaker. I wouldnt want u to be drinking and kayaking.
All I have done at work today is eat and try to get my coworker to tie me to his bed again
i formally give you permission to eat me when i pass out
Thinking of someone think of me while masturbating while I masturbate. & that's how the over thinkers do it ✌️
When the sex is so good, you need three fans and have to chug a gallon of water after
We have had more Sex in the past 48 hours then we have in the past 3 months. I think it was from me dressing up as Darth Vader.
I can't possibly be the only person who has ever eaten Cheetos with a spoon to avoid the powder getting in my fingers
I'm officially removing you from my nudes recipient list on snapchat.
Randomize
