How'd it feel making her break her religion?
I have 250 contacts there has to be someone sober to take me to taco bell
So... i mean if they do have cameras in his apartment buildings pool room atleast we gave them a little show.
Just a heads up. Everytime I get arrested in Maine I claim I lost my ID and use your name.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I miss vodka workout Fridays
When sleeping with someone new: should you hide the magnum condoms, or let him know what he has to live up to?
In all seriousness, if tomorrow night becomes a heated game of Which Ex Gets To Take The Plastered Birthday Girl Home, I'm going to bow out with my integrity intact.
You didn't even properly utilize my pigtails.
After 3 dates I think I'm failing at painting the "sweet guy with a future" picture and more painting the "this is the guy to call when you've run out of options and want to get fucked in half drunk to forget about it" picture.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
As we were passing the joint around, people were dunking Jenga pieces in Vaseline and sticking them to the window. I also smoked weed with a girl that was in an above the influence commercial.
It's the warm chocolate goeyness of a brownie combined with the heavenly taste of weed-smell... Why have I never done this before?
Also, totally got laid in my yellow rubber boots and it was awesome.
Wake up. Eat bread. Find your dignity. Don't be late for work again.
I can't believe I got dumped for a fat chick, but at least I got four and a half years worth of free shit. So we can call it even.
its like my accent is a device for a 100% chance of sex every time i leave the apartment. i love being english in this country.
Randomize