And for 6 straight hours, I laid on my bedroom floor trying to convince myself it would perfectly acceptable to pee on my own floor
how does a 20 year old who hasnt gone through puberty yet score the game winning goal? fuck sidney crosby and his small nuts.
It honestly wasnt my fault this time. i was in shock. WHO THE FUCK OWNS A PEACOCK?!
For future reference, the words 'big' and 'problem' should be used sparingly with a person whom you have recently had copious amounts of unprotected sex
We sang "Whole New World" in harmony and he spun me around. You may now barf from the cuteness.
I only know two things that kitchen floors are good for... sex and quesadillas that got dropped. You know, the five second rule
It's just unfortunate. She's a 28 year old woman who looks as if a pelican and ET had a baby. With braces.
I hate that we are older than the real world people now
He lit a candle for the mood and ended up lighting my hair on fire while we were hooking up...moodkiller
i peed in the parking lot at work not even thinking, a woman saw
I don't know where I keep finding these guys, but mi power bottoms es su power bottoms.
She has no problem going ass to mouth, but won't eat the pizza crust. I don't get it.
I'm a girl who met my last three bfs in gay clubs. Think I'm doing something wrong?
Speaking of which.. there's underwear in my backseat and Arby's cheese sauce on my door handle. So much for my new Volvo bringing out my classy side.
Thanks for duct tapping my dick to my leg while I was passed out. I could only aim straight down. I stood on your bed. Have a nice day at work!
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