is it bad that i kinda- ok, reallyyy don't remember having sex with him last night?
I got so high last night I started crying because i couldn't stop thinking about how scary space is
Tonight we are playing Scuba-Keg. Getting keg now. I'll explain when i get home.
I found the perfect eye liner, it passed the blow job test, no smudging!!
I sleep with the gay men, they no longer have questions about their sexuality. No strings attached at it's finest and i get new shopping buddies out if it. It really is a win win situation.
You are my idol.
but I'll probably watch some porn later so it's not a complete waste of a Saturday night.
We just laid there in bed together, petting his dick and repeating, "IT FEELS LIKE VELVET!!!"
New low reached: a cockroach has actually drowned itself in our dirty dishes. We are heathens. Cleaning dance party tonight. No excuses.
Props to you. You took the bet seriously. Making out with her for an hour right after she spewed
moral of my life: don't tell a guy you want to have sex with him. he'll get back together with his ex.
I've been rehabbing my soul with cheese and wine lately
Dude, he danced with the dog that some random chick was carrying at the bar. Then the dog jumped out of his arms and ran away. THAT definitely deserves a drink.
I will be the DD but everyone has to call me Mistress
You can't be mad... I'm letting you jerk off in my parents shower
you know you need to get laid when: getting wrestled to the ground in a self-defense class turns you on....p.s. this is a booty call
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