Its not drinking alone if you got Tiger on the Wii.
I woke up this morning and was hoping we drank enough last night to have a unicorn drawn on my wrist. Good News: We did.
his ringtone is the jonas brothers. get me the fuck out of here NOW.
She STILL went home with me even when I said yes when she asked if I had an infectious disease. Turns out she asked if I had an infectious spirit...well she has my infectious spirit now
You know its going to be a good homecoming when you beer bong a mimosa at 6am.
Day 3. Will have to postpone job hunting by a month. May have blown out my knee. Was sunburned on Friday. Now look painted red. Still alive. All worth it.
my new ipod has external speakers and a video camera...all i can think about is how much more convenient it would be for me to make a pretty decent sex tape
He's throwing up in my bed and I'm not even getting fucked for this
Well girls crying gets you hard so you're not really a good standard to me
He put up a Facebook album attempting to sell off their Harvard furniture. Items for sale include: his friend, a broken lamp, an item described as a 'carpet and/or sleeping bag', a pair of paint stained cargo pants, size 'Tyler', and a self proclaimed $3 bottle of wine, which he is offering for $2
He burnt his arm on the grill, then turned around and started blaming it on the burger buns...I think it's safe to say he's drunk.
Im about to smoke a huge bowl. My penis is so happy. Who needs girls.
maybe one of us should just pity fuck him and get it over with.
I just walked out of the side door of the bar to come in the front door so no one would know I've been here drinking before our work meeting.
Just got up.... With the club stamp on my ass.... How did it got there????
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