did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
i think i would be perfectly content if, on my deathbed, i could look back on a life that didn't have any fisting in it
Is it a bad that I spent my 5 year anniversary with my husband texting my ex boyfriend?
i was just skypeing her and i saw the vagisil medicated wipes in the corner of her room. i'll be breaking this off tomorrow
i just had to google what happens if your dog eats your nuva ring
Just bonged a beer from a vuvuzela...this place is only doing good for me
at least the cop wrote "happy birthday" on the ticket.
I saw a kid peeing outback so I yelled "you have a small pecker, but its ok cuz when life gives you lemons..." and proceeded to throw lemons at him
I've made out with more people in 2014 than I did the whole fall semester
You just get me....like our souls are boning in the spirit world
Day drunk. He was sitting in the back seat, opened the door, leaned out, and peed right there in the dutch bros drive through. No one even noticed haha
You sending me our unborn, unfertilized babies' names is not what I envisioned when you said you'd "drunk text me later".
Woke up to find that I was cock blocked by no more than three people.
Apparently I’m a terrible influence when alcohol is involved
We met behind our asshole boss's back with the intent to oust him from the company. If this revolution is a success, bring nachoes.
Randomize
