We just picked up about 540 lbs of women....
We'll cross that bridge when we come to it... Or burn it. Either way we'll deal with it later
it's like your virginity...sometimes you have to pretend like it's still there
yea i guess its safe to say fire extinguishers are not synonymous with whip cream cans
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Definitely got drunk and sent her a literal picture of my asshole. I titled it " you"
what kind of one night stand wants to walk you home in the morning? whole diff kind of walk of shame.
It was like giving head to a cactus.
So good!! I became real good friends with an adorable black lesbian couple from Baltimore and a man in a diaper.
Still at home. Videotaping hamsters.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah except my drinking partners aka my parents went to sleep Cuz ya know, they're old.
I mean I want to go somewhere. I just don't want to put on pants or behave.
Tomorrow is my favorite texting day of the year... It's where I send every guy I've had sex with this past year a text saying "happy not a Father's Day" and we laugh and I get so much dick it's wonderful.
After you smoke one night. Just whisper in a barely audible voice, "Grey Poupon"
Wait... so you had sex and then your ear drum ruptured? I'm not sure if I want to ask if the two are related...
I have two choices: tits or tacos. I just can't decide.
Randomize