if i'm ever as drunk as the girl in front of me... kill me.
The only thing he got me during our relationship was a cum stain in my backseat. I choose winners.
it's not gay if you rub your penis between their butt cheeks and pretend they are tits
I wonder if there will ever be a day where I don't find lisps really really hilarious.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Henry's handball, Tiger Wood's Car Crash, Roger Federer losing ... That's it....I'm throwing my Gillete away
They both told everyone they fell in a mud puddle
Oh they definetly fell in the mud, repeatedly, on top of each other
We had three bowls going. It was a tri-bowl tournament. Harry potter shit.
how sketchy is it to eat a candy wrapped in masking tape from reggae night? because we totally just split it...
I think I am calling out of work due to a hangover. I'm 96% sure there ISN'T tampon stuck inside me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The taxi driver was going on about how many drunk chicks want to sleep with him when he drives them home. Not sure if he was bragging or hinting
Hell hath no fury like a woman whose gay sidekick you insult
It was an all night sausage fest and I was the lady of honor.
Note to self: never fuck a Canadian, surprisingly highly disappointing
Ethically, this is the worst thing I've ever done. Financially, however...
So Blakes coming home... so if youre like fingerbanging the shit out of yourself on the kitchen table...wrap it up
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