Hey kate, how is it?
sloppy...it's emily. kate just tried to do a keg stand. they dropped her. we're leaving.
if hell is full of stilettos, fake tans, bleached hair, overused make-up, drawn out s's and blatent bitchiness, then i'm in hell right now.
Lol welcome to greek life
the last thing i remember is fucking her. GAME CHANGER i woke up in another bedroom to her younger sister blowing me
I told him to go down on me and when he did he started crying!! I asked him why and he said my vag looked just like his ex girlfriends!!!
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Drinking Grey Goose on the toilet. Don't make me graduate.
Getting stoned and going to costco. If i'm not back by dawn, you know what to do.
These hangoverless Sunday mornings are becoming too regular.
I opened up my wallet and it was filled with puke.
No more fucking baseball tools. Walk-of-shamed home in only a pinstriped jersey and a Red Sox SnapBack.
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He never answered about passing his structures test no matter how I asked him. He did send a text saying that he would be "pouring alcohol into his head and balls" so I'm guessing he has to retake the whole class.
Hey ask him if he likes swappy seconds
Still at home. Videotaping hamsters.
He didn't call me beautiful but he came in less than five minutes so same thing, right?
On another note, I kinda only wanna poop laying down now
Oh I had the weirdest dream in which I was an archeologist stealing a golden dildo from a snobby British person
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