woke up with peach flovored chap stick on my taint ! dont ask why i know it was peach
you announced to the whole room that instead of shaving you were planning to start straightening and then braiding your pubes. awkward silence followed by everyone leaving.
Omg. It looks like a crack pipe exploded in your mouth.
I like to balance the number of cups of coffee to bong rips in the morning before work.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Are some dicks heavier than others? Random question as I'm feeling mine.
It was like die hard. Except with more penises.
I haven't been motivated enough for a shirt. And only half the day was bra-worthy.
Last night must have been awesome because I went to get in the shower only to find the bat symbol drawn on my chest
That happened during battle shots lol
You don't have to have sex with both if us but I would like a little positive fucking regard.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
is there a line between daddy kink and oedipus complex?
I think I was just recruited to join a religious lesbian cult by these 3 really pretty girls and I'm tempted to join
Curing hangovers with more alcohol was a great idea for the first five days
I need a fucking roommate.
You need a fucking babysitter.
I feel like a dancer trapped in the body of a math instructor. Love, Mom
After the "sex" was over I dressed as quickly as possible. And then he came over to me stark naked and embraced me. For over a minute. And all I could think was please get your penis off my dress.
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