we are at a mexican restaurant and the tv is playing mexican porn. dad won't stop watching.
i freaking love being in a circle of guys. if i fart none of them suspect me.
I want you more than these girls want KFC
So Ive been fucking her for the past couple months and i just found our that my grandfather and her grandmother were fuck buddies for a while. I feel like this is a new awesome family tradition that skips a generation.
not to mention it took an hour of antique roadshow to calm my dick down
Are we responsible for the snowmen doing it doggy-style in my front yard?
If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
She showed up to the party with a live octopus and a 30 pack that was already half gone
They left at like 4. I got up to help clean their house this morning and we found his pants. No ones heard from him, we're all a little scared.
Just had to buy plan b w/ my robotic baby from family living.. Awkward.
After we drank 3, we built a raft out of the empties and installed the fourth submerged In the water to keep it cool. Keg boats are now a thing
You are so lucky you didn't go back to Tate's house. They decided to figure out who had the biggest balls... I was the judge
It's like my uterus was saying, "hey, you're not pregnant, but imagine if you were!"
OK BUT WHO THE FUCK FORGTS A LIVE CHICKEN IN MY HOUSE
Apparently his version of saying "I'm Sorry" is streaking around our apartment building then asking for a blow job.....
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