I'm walking behind a man wearing a womans shirt, heels, mens pants and a baseball hat
I tried to pay my bar tab with my gym membership card. Twice.
you kept calling numbers in ur phone book and saying, "I love your show, I'm a long time listener, first time caller."
I woke up wearing just my underwear and a headlamp at a different house than I remember passing out at. I told you irish car bombs are not made with an entire guinness.
Vodka infused whipped cream. Shit just got real.
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
"Let's chug a beer then make out" doesn't sound as nice, but it would prob make him cum right there.
You don't know how badly I want to just hold you as a soup spoon holds a bisque
All I remember is sitting on your kitchen floor and playing with a banana like it was a viking ship.
Know anything about my roof collapsing last night?
Tequila.
I wish I had a Tina from Bob's Burgers in real life. She would be the best wingman.
HOW DID I LET MYSELF GET SUCKED IN HE HAS A PENIS FOR PETE'S SAKE.
I have in my possession one ukulele shaped package.
We aren't doing Shrooms tonight bc that would be friendship cheating on you
There's a big ass bed, hella ecstasy, and I can guarantee you'll regret every second that you remember.
Randomize
