what the fuck were we smoking when we had a conversation about how my brother would be so proud if i fucked an orange alien?!?
Maryland truck stops are full of people with killer mustaches
I caved and texted him. But it's strictly drug dealing business so it doesn't count.
Roommate is eating a chimichanga, watching Dr Doolittle 2 and weeping. His Tuesday hangovers make me feel better about my life.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am still STD free so as far as I am concerned I never went to panama.
It was like giving head to a cactus.
Still not over the fact that we prayed to Jesus to help us win beer pong
I'm literally in the bathroom for two minutes and I walk out to a random dude with his face in your tits
Philosophical question for you: is it better to go into work slightly drunk or slightly coked out?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ive got small boobs, but they sure do like to pop out and party with the big dogs.
I was told i took a shot doing a headstand in the backseat then proceeded to barf all over my face
I had no idea you were so talented.
Since moving to the suburbs, all I do is fuck my ex and watch cartoons. It's not so bad.
Fuck. Totally just had sex instead of studying for econ test in an hour. Gonna get fucked again. HELP ME WITH YOUR EXTENSIVE KNOWLEDGE OF ECON
man do I wish I knew who this naked guy in my room was...
Slowly dying because of my period and my phone is mocking me because I have 69% battery
Randomize