I'm fucking your sister right now.
You motherfucker
She's next.
sometimes i wish i had a whole other life to spend on youtube
she just punched a dude and called him a peasant for not drinking fast enough in flip cup.
I'm drinking screwdrivers in the pool naked. Call 911 if I don't check in regularly
So how many licks to the face does it take to get kicked out of the bar?
Whoever brought the pigeon, please come and remove it from my living room.
So basically, I've just woken up in another random bed and I go to get my pants and he's wearing them. Like my underwear is in them... What the fuck is wrong with my life?
also, add "teaching boys to sext" to my charity work
He sent me a picture of his dick earlier so now we can all laugh at him tomorrow
She who has the vag holds all the power. He will learn one way or the other.
Because Kyle had a tattoo kit at his house and I wanted one and all he could draw was a mustache or a stickman on fire
Please tell me last night did not happen and there is another reason why my phone smells like ranch sauce ahahah
You said you were uncomfortable with your body and then you started making whale noises
Drunkenly tried to auction off Merik's pancakes at Ihop. Apparently I make a great auctioneer. Also, no one wants 30 cent pancakes.
I'm fine with our borderline lesbian behavior.
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