I'll hook up with guys I don't even like, as long as they leave early enough the next day.
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
i hate always having to make my eye shadow look really good since my eyes always end up closed by the end of the night in pics
Wow thanks 4 throwing jello at me an yelling who invited that guy to all the guys at the bar
The liquor store manager told us to drink responsible as we checked out and we laughed to his face. Like we're buying karkov at noon, responsibility is out of the question
He came up and told us to watch as he chugged his beer with no hands. Then asked if he could come drunk swimming with us.
And apparently midway I said "hurry up and finish so we can talk about what a bad idea this was"
So... Apparently, "Home" isn't the correct response when a cop asks for your address...
You have no idea what this goes for my ego. I literally made you cum in your sleep.
She's in the bathroom. Literally just told me she could make a guy cum using just her words. Not bad for Sunday brunch.
Have you ever come so hard that right after you have the urge to yell "make me a sandwich!"? ...I think my ovaries turned into testicles.
Funny how I'm trusting a magic 8 ball I found in the kids toy section to tell me about my sex life
Woke up with a 22 year old with the number for a different girl written on my stomach, almost 30 can suck my dick I still got this shit
Apparently calling shotgun while getting put into a police car is frowned upon
I'm seriously considering selling my books back early. I don't use them anyways and I could really use the beer money..
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