So i've def seen the girl running for student body VP getting fingered in a bar.
I've been drunk so often this summer being sober is exciting
he's werid. hell kiss me after i go down on him but he wont kiss me after i eat anything with mustard.
I swear if it wasn't for meeting for drug dealers @ gas stations, i would never remember to get gas.
Quick question: how long can sperm live in a rug?
Apparently, his doctor was impressed with how well we took care of his leg. We're like the kings of naked triage.
I think her version of saying goodnight was being flung over a guys shoulder as he said, "Bitch. You don't need no shoes."
The less fucks you give, the more fucks you get. Kinda like "a penny saved is a penny earned" but with vagina.
Always wear a seatbelt when giving road head. I think I'm just going to tell people I don't remember how I got the fat lip.
People will call it the Wrath of the Froyo. We'll be immortalized.
Did I run into a tree or get punched in the face?
Both.
I think I'm pregnant again.
or as we call it, thursday.
Pretty sure I was naked for most of the night.....success
I'll start working on my manners when you stop using please and thank you in the bedroom.
How is there a hawk inside this house? More importantly how the hell is he handling it without any gear?
Randomize
