Any toy can be an adult toy. Location, location, location.
Anywhere you can eat green eggs and ham, you can have sex.
someone just sent me a bong wrapped in christmas paper in the mail. signed 'santa'.
Hungover snowboarding. Puked off the lift and traumatized a group lesson for kids. Crash course on adulthood.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
his blanket is still in the back seat of my car, its like a constant reminder of his small penis
Its 6:30 and I'm shotguning a busch ice while taking a shit. Outlook for work today: interesting
They set the pop up pool in the basement-running filter and all. Drunk swimming. Come now.
You owe me new eyes. The ones I have are burned with your balls into the back of my eyes. And every time I close them, your balls are right there...
ill give you food and tequilla and penis and joy
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
$200 on plane. $110 on train. $5 per drink on plane. $15 per case on train. Plane 1 hour flight. Train 9 hour excursion. Hmmmmm.
So I've decided to grow a vagina forest. Because I'm single and it's like a zen garden. Brings a new meaning to long hair don't care.
We made out a little and then he gave me some weed. I would say it was a pretty productive stop on my way home
I need to be put in a corner surrounded by pamphlets of stds and babies
well, i found him passed out on a picnic table two miles away with a lit cig in his hand...he had a rough night
Dick pics just aren’t doing it for me, this bowl of Mac n cheese and Game of Thrones trump you tenfold
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