Please tell me how I woke up out in the middle of nowhere wearing nothing but a hard hat and a man thong?
just watched a girl laugh at her own fingers... it's not even noon...
I feel bad for the person that has to clean the dishes that I peed on last night.
I find out next week of the Australian was lying about his vasectomy or not. Keep your fingers crossed!
you really cant fit homeless dj into your budget? doubles as charity
I have a boner and a quesadilla why aren't you here
Its not college unless your study breaks were to go throw up from blacking out the night before
I'm pretty sure my lung is caught on my rib. And I can't feel the left side of my face. Best. Sex. Ever.
Can we just talk about how the only thing I have on my camera from this weekend is a video of you putting your whole fist in your mouth hahahha
Final Summary: could he eat a lit sparkler? Probably. Could he do it while peeing off the roof? I'll tell you when you get to the ER.
I have never thoroughly inspected the geometry of my nipples until now. How do I fix this?
He deserves someone who will touch his penis at 3 a.m.
Just for once I'd like my first interaction with a new GP to not be an obvious sex injury.
I never said it was inaccurate, I said I hate you.
Girl i am always here for you. But i am going to have sex now so im going to call you in the morning.
Randomize
