he confessed his love for me, threw up on my pillow and then fell asleep on said pillow. i met him last night.
better than last weekend. things are really looking up for you.
So I pulled my t-shirt down, pushed my boobs up and marched right into that church!
I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
hooking up with my manager sounds like an even better idea while i'm sober.
I've spent more money on drugs for bonnaroo than my actual ticket. Proudly.
it wasnt even considered partying. it was like "ok, who can get the most shitfaced and not pass out"
Nothing like pulling a bottle of vodka out of your purse at 7am in the security line to make your fellow passengers uncomfortable...
Sorry if this is weird, but please don't have sex in my truck. I get to be the first...
Well, our assistant supervisor caught us on the back stairs...he invited us on a double date with his fiance and him. I guess our job approves of the relationship?
He's pretty cool once you ignore the fact that he's trying to get into your pants
i stood outside in the bushes for thirty minutes. Do you know how many drunk guys pee in bushes at 2 am?
Last thing I remember I was riding on a picnic table being hauled around by a lawn mower with an empty case of bud light on my head...
You’d probably be happy to know that I think I’ve mastered the skill of knowing “my type” and then steering clear
FINALLY. I THOUGHT THIS DAY WOULD NEVER COME!
You just thought it would be a good idea to show your penis to your best friend. No harm, no foul.
No offense, but I don’t think I would want to see him in anything skimpier than a hazmat suit.
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