Only in Alabama do they play hymns in a bar!!!
he told me my vagina needed a tic tac
is asking a girl out on a date while in another girls bed in poor taste?
i wish there was a 'silent except for booty calls' volume level on my phone
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I thought it went well, but he just sent me a video of me sucking an icicle on the fire escape of his building with the caption "The ice got more than I did." Somehow I feel like I owe him a blowjob.
Just wait til you visit, there will be an endless supply of fresh dick for your demand #economics
How did you get him out of the shower last time?
Order Taco Bell and leave a trail of burritos leading to his bed.
I just realized I slept with a guy who used the pickup line "do you have a bandaid? I skinned my knee when I fell for you."
I went by my nickname in rehab. It made it feel more like summer camp.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Watching my ex make out with another girl is weird.
But she's wearing a jumpsuit so I feel better.
I wound up running down the street in 12 degree weather in just my bra and then fell asleep cuddling my bottle. You tell me how last night went.
You sat on me. Like I was a toilet. While I was on the toilet. You peed a little.
The first time he ever tried to hold my hand, I moon walked away.
How do I let my trainer know I'm only at the gym so I can get in more intense sex positions?
I opened the bathroom door and the starting point gaurd was eating out my art history professor
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