lets hang out tonight and do stupid stuff.
Dating you for 6 months was stupid enough. But thanks.
i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
Sex on a kitchen table is not as amazing as they make is seem in the movies.
The project manager just came into talk to me for the first time and I had justed googled best drum solo ever and couldn't X out of the screen.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The more I hate his personality, the more I love his penis.
YouTube is recomending me a video on how to make a home made meth bong, what has my life come to?
I'm pretty sure whiskey overrules bulimia in the eyes of Texas boys
Aw lol. Sounds like my masturbation injury last year
He lectured me about the dangers of drugs while wearing a sombrero and doing interpretive dance.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was taking a bath while he walked in, sat down on the toilet, and said "its like a baby, I can see it crowning."
her vagina just converted me to Judaism.
Please tell me you werent the one who replaced every beer bottle in my fridge with a picture of a baby kitten.
... and if i was..
Fuck. You.
I'm beginning to think the entirety of my appeal is due to the size of my ass.
Was I just dreaming, or was there a corpse at work last night?
She was just sleeping.
Is it bad that I'm kind of disappointed by that?
Of course he’s picking me up at the airport. I taught him the Lotus position last time we had sex.
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