I'm looking for sex. Do you know her?
try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
I twisted my ankle last night doing a super high five with 3 inch heels on.
He snuck into some random hotel's continental breakfast at 3 AM and then passed out on a bench in the lobby. When the cops found him they made him empty out his pockets. No phone, no ID just muffins.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he asked if he could put his cape on while he was still inside me.
by the end of the night two people were passed out at the table, three on the couches, and one in the bathroom. it looked like someone pumped sleeping gas into the middle of a dinner party.
This should be a warning to men everywhere: do not send pictures of your erect penis to women you hardly know - they will add cats and send them to all of their friends.
My mom just walked in and she was like "Who ate all of the cheese?" and all I could think of was you trying to become a human taco
Of course not. I'd be offended if you didn't bring my boobs into casual conversation.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
because. if I can't sit outside naked and eat my watermelon every morning then I really don't see the point in moving in with you.
I don't go out. I live in my room watching Bridget Jones and thanking my vibrator for existing.
Do you have a moment to talk about our lord and savior, Kendra's boobs?
He said I was so drunk and high that I had a conversation w/ his goldfish. The video shows me clearly conversing as if talking to a person w/ pauses in conversation and everything
Ok fell asleep on a bus in south Carolina just woke up in Canada where the hell is the liquor store from here?!
Put my boyfriend in a chastity cage while he was passed out last night. Now I control his orgasms.
Randomize