My sheets at my parents place are clean. No braveheart but I can paint myself, yell "freedom", and sword fight you with my cock. So come over.
What about the words "You're my personal dildo" made him say "I love you"?
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
k so who do I think I'm kidding applying to culinary school? I just fucked up a microwaveable pizza
just heard 2 nerds making fun of a girl for mispronouncing stochiometry. they followed it up by discussing the mathematical equation for getting laid. my day just became 100x better.
Blood. All over. Pre coke adventure needs to slow down unless I'm involved
I'm not drunk enough to eat silly string
its the kind of pain that only someone with a fucking elephant on their head would understand. I'm never drinking again.
The only thing I remember from last night is being naked in his bed if that's not summer drinking at it's finest then I don't wanna live anymore
Literally just saw a 7 year old intently rub his penis on the metro. I'm not ready for this
of course the one day I come to class high we have guest speakers from the police department... Just my luck
I'm eating a block of cheese like its a sandwich in the tsa line
No, no... It was great. I feel like my liver took a vodka shower and washed it's hair with pabst
Goat in kitchen.....explanation?....
So, 'head before the store' turned into a fuck fest, & that's how I ended up at the grocery store smelling like a cum farm on Black Friday. How's your weekend?
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