hotel room ftw
i think the semi hot bartender might actually be a man in drag..on a similar note, what are you drinking?
i just heard my neighbor say from outside my window "i don't give a shit what he does, what the hell am i gonna do with my son's penis?"
then they high fived as they party boyed me. I was a policewoman sandwhich. I love you halloween.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Do you think my parents will accept my drinking habits more if I told them I like to drink every night because I take good shits the next morning?
I tipped the hot bartender my entire wallet. Again.
Hey couldn't find water bottle to put margs in whole bottle in purse gonna stop and get cups and ice from starbucks and burrito from una mas want a quesadilla
It's like god touched my soul and said 'you will be great in bed'
I woke up to her screaming at the various pictures of nutsacks she found on her camera
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Know we haven't talked but having an orgy party on the 20th if you're interested. If not, disregard this text.
Who is this?
Man, coughing on your period is like the biggest gamble a girl can make.
How was jagerbomb pong?
It was like communism. Great in theory. Terrible when put into practice
Can you leave her a note saying "did you enjoy watching me fuck your roommate?"
I will.
How you run into a glAss door three times in a row I do not know
I live in Vegas It shouldn’t be this hard to find a penis looking for a night of no strings attached sex
Randomize